Progress!

So!  My last post was about me spending more quality time with my son, being more conscious around him when it comes to being on my phone & being more present mentally instead of spending so much time thinking about what i am going to do during nap time! Ya'll I have put my phone down!  And Facebook did not crash, Instagram is still full of pictures from people I don't know & Pinterest is still full of crap I'll never do or make!

My son has been kinder.  I know that probably sound weird for an almost 16 month old but its so true.  I realize that is because I wasn't paying attention to him so he would act out.  We have been going outside, playing catch, singing songs, dancing, going on adventures to the neighborhood pool, laughing so much and I have noticed that the more attention I give him the more he listens to me!

We even got out of the house this weekend & went to a birthday party and church!  It was amazing! This week we have several appointments so we will be busy with that and the pool again on Friday!  Oh & he said ball today! :) My mommy heart was so proud of him!

He also learned how to do this today...

Ciao for now!

Sam

On Being Mom

 I am not a perfect person.  I do not want to be a perfect person.  I do however want to be a good person.  I want to be a good mom. The kind of mom that when my kids are older they remember me being on the floor playing with them and reading to them and always making time for them.  I want to be the kind of mom that doesn't get so engaged in her phone & counting down the minutes until naptime so often that those times outweigh the ones where I am on the floor playing or even just interacting in anyway.

With that said I am realizing that the latter has slowly become me.  Over the last three months with pregnancy symptoms in full gear & fatigue being the most abundant I have become that mom.  I find myself getting upset with my 15 month old because he is getting into things he usually doesn't because I am lost in my phone.  He has come up to me on several occasions and swatted my phone out of my hand and my heart breaks as I realize what I am doing.  I am wasting away into Facebook, Pinterest & Instagram while I am counting down the minutes until nap time so I can be lost in these apps in peace & not have to look up every few minutes to make sure my son is not jumping off the top of the couch or chewing on electric cords and getting mad at him when he is.  Really??? Then the kicker is I find myself on these apps reading & liking articles that have to do with spending time with your children!  Jeeze am I a hypocrite!  I am grossed out by myself right now!

Please understand that I am not judging these mothers that do this I am simply talking about myself.  For me this behavior is unacceptable.  And I fully believe that sometimes a mom just needs to veg out for a bit.  I have just gone to the extreme in my vegging to the point where some days its all I do and I am seriously annoyed with having to care for my child.  I do not neglect him in his basic needs but I do not interact with him or I will give him the most convenient thing for lunch.

My point in writing this post is to hold myself accountable.  I am confessing my failures in hopes that I will be more interactive with my son.  I will get off the couch and off my phone while my son is awake & play with him.  I will take the time to make healthier meals for my family.  We will be more active together!

This blog is about me being better.  So I will do my best to be a better mom!  Maybe even posting here more regularly on how I am trying to do that! ;)

Cheers
Sam

A New Direction

So I started writing here a few weeks ago with the purpose of sharing my weightloss journey with the world!  I still plan to share my story, only my story is now going to look a little different!

Here's why...

Yep I found out yesterday that I am indeed pregnant!  I have not gone to the doctor yet as I am only 5 weeks along!  But we are beyond excited!

So now my journey will be more about having a healthy pregnancy!  I plan to follow the Brewers Pregnancy Diet and exercise regularly!  I was 2 pounds away from my pre-pregnancy weight from Bash when I found out about this little peanut so I am hoping to not gain too much & stay a lot more active than I was so that maybe it will be a little easier labor for me this time! I will be posting updates & sharing healthy recipes along with what I am doing to stay active!

Stay Healthy My Friends!

The unknown...

I know that as a military spouse I should be used to the unknowns by now.  I know that in this lifestyle especially they are inevitable.  I know that every few years my life is going to be tossed about to land only God knows where.  However, being pregnant and not knowing is a whole new ballgame!

I am a daydreamer.  I love thinking about the future and imagining where we will live and what kind of house we will have and the friends and the job (because that can really make or break an assignment!) the sponsors and well everything!  I imagine it all!  Now I am pregnant & have no idea where we are going to live when my baby is born. I have no idea where my baby will be born.  I do know that I will be moving internationally with an almost 2 year old & either 36 weeks pregnant or with a 1 month old!  I can't even think about that though because that just increases the anxiety through the roof!

I have talked to several people about my fears & anxieties over this and they all keep saying the same thing...stop thinking about it!  If I know that daydreaming sends me into a stressed out wreck...stop daydreaming!  Okay!  In just about every case where you are told to just stop doing something it is easier said than done!  So I started thinking about how I can stop daydreaming and here is what I came up with!

First this came to mind..."do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." ~Philippians 4:6-7

So this is telling me that when I start to feel anxious instead pray & ask God about whatever is causing me grief & He will give me peace. Notice it doesn't say he will give you answers, but He will give you peace! His peace!  Okay I will gladly take that!

Then I thought about this..."Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest." ~Matthew 11:28

This verse is Jesus telling us to stop trying to save ourselves and let Him save us.  It is so much easier to surrender control of your life to God than to try to be in control of it ourselves.  He can do anything & I can do nothing! (For nothing will be impossible with God.~Luke 1:37)

And then of course every time I think about the future or making plans I think about this..."For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope." ~ Jeremiah 29:11

Though I am not in exile like those this was addressed to I do find comfort in it!  It tells me that there is a point and that my struggles, when done with Jesus, are simply a means to an end & when I think about what He endured for me I can not be saddened by not knowing where we are going to live in a year!

  It seems like small potatoes when I think about what I am complaining about and what Jesus went through so that I may be forgiven.  I understand that some may say they are incomparable but i believe that not comparing everything to that, not remembering that everyday in every situation is in a way making us more & Him less.   I am in no way saying that I am perfect & do in fact remember this all the time, but I try to.  If the next time you start moaning & groaning about something you have to do think about Jesus up on that cross.  When I do it makes me hold myself accountable more. He was willing to go through all of that for ME!  The least I can do is remember as often as possible.

With that I am striving to no longer daydream at least for now while it causes me anxiety!  I am striving to remember Jesus everyday instead!


Happy Monday Peeps!

#33days The Final Beginning to my Weightloss Journey

As I am writing this I am nine days into a 33 day journey.  In 2013 my husband & I started on this program called Take Shape for Life.  My husband initially lost 52 pounds in 75 days & lost 26 pounds in the same amount of days! {go figure men always lose quicker! jerks!} Well then some life happened & I got pregnant & gained 34 pounds and was back at square one again and then some! But having a baby was an adjustment as it was our first one together and that first year was rough despite having an amazing baby who slept through the night since he was 7 weeks old! I have lost most of my baby weight in the last 13 months but even when I lose that I still have a ways to go before I reach a healthy weight.  I had a bunch of TSFL meal replacements left from the last time I tried to commit to plan so I counted them up & had 33 days worth of food.  I saw it everyday like it was taunting me it hung over my head.  I thought about the money we spent on it & how throwing it away would upset my husband {and myself too if I'm honest!}.  I thought about how much I want to get healthy & have the energy to play with my energetic toddler.  I thought about how God gave me this body & how I dishonored & disrespected it for years allowing myself to gain almost a hundred pounds.  I thought about how I feel when I get dressed in the mornings & how I feel when I see myself in the mirror & how I feel, when I undress in front of my husband.  I didn't like any of it. So I decided that since I am struggling with being disciplined I would go back on plan.  For 33 days. I will be disciplined for 33 days. I will not quit on myself for 33 days.  I will learn how to honor this temple He has given me.  I will succeed!  The first 9 days were tough!  Lots of emotions & talking myself down from diving face first into a box of Girl Scout cookies.  I pushed through & this morning I measured myself to see how far I have come in 9 days.  I have lost 5.5lbs & 6 total inches!  If that isn't motivation idk what is!  24 days to go!  Follow my journey on instagram also!

This is my progress picture so far!

Cheers Y'all!